We are back in Weedon Bec, the village where Saint Werburgh banished the geese.

However, these days a stained glass window of goose banishment is not enough to pack the pews. Modern christian outreach also includes free WiFi.

Anglican churches are doing all sorts of things just to get people in the door. Coffee shops, comfy chairs, amusement park rides, brothels. OK, I made it up about the brothels but it’s probably only a matter of time till the Church of England rediscovers temple prostitutes. They are that desperate. There seems to be an assumption that being in a church will turn you into a christian in the same way that being in a garage will turn you into a car. However, I can’t help feeling that free WiFi will only attract Satanists with bad data plans.

The church is pretty, though. The bell tower is 12th century (look at those round Norman arches) but the rest was rebuilt by the Victorians as usual.

The bells date from 1601 to 1950.

Inside the church is a model of the church made entirely out of matchsticks.

Inside the model there is a model of the model made entirely out of rabbit whiskers, assembled under a microscope by Peruvian watchmaker.

Or not.

I liked this guy on the font. I’m not sure if it’s an angel, a demon, or a flying cow.

Now this is weird. There is a mooring ring in the aisle right next to one of the pews.

Is that where you tie up your horse when you ride it into church? Or does that whole stone block lift up revealing a dreadful secret in the crypt? Zombies? Cybermen? Or just the place where Werburgh entombed the geese who refused to leave? Maybe it’s a seething pit of zombie-cyber-geese.

I just hope it’s a heavy stone.

There are damselflies gracing the canal, and the blackberries are ripe. We finally have some warm weather. I think this weekend we are actually getting summer.